Major ways parents can maintain a good relationship with their kids

Sequel to yesterday's blog on MAINTAINING A GOOD RELATIONSHIP WITH YOUR KIDS , Today we would be talking about the Major ways parents can maintain a good relationship with their kids.

Stop humiliating them

This can be done by scolding them in front of others, making fun of them or discussing their weaknesses with others while they are present. Some parents will argue with this point and say that as parents, they have the mandate to talk to their children in whatever way they deem fit. They must note that these children are various individuals with their own thought process. Most of the reprimands that parents melt out to their kids in public are mostly never adhered to. The replies given to this from the children are anger, continued disobedience and sometimes outright rudeness.

Would you like your boss to reprimand you in front of other employees? What if he made fun of an idea or comment that you made, or talked negatively about you with other employees? You would probably feel hurt, humiliated and angry. Similarly, your child will likely be hurt and angry if you humiliate him or her in these ways.

Avoid comparing them to others and practicing favouritism.

It is very easy for a parent to compare one child to another or to have a favoured child. Parents may mistakenly think that by evaluating the child against his or her siblings or other children, the misbehaving child will be encouraged to straighten up. However, this can actually cause lifelong harsh feelings of inferiority in a child who is being negatively compared or not favoured, and can ultimately cause him or her to become frustrated and dangerously resentful. You are not encouraging the child with comparison or favouritism, instead you are making the child more hardened not only to you but also to the person you are constantly comparing him or her to and this can lead to a bad addiction like drugs to take the edge off or worst suicide if the child feels he or she isn’t good enough. Each child is unique and should be loved equally as different individuals.

Don’t be a hypocrite

                


As children grow older they begin watching their parents’ actions more closely. Your child may become confused and angry with you if you do the same things that you have corrected him or her for doing. For example, if you punished your child for using vile language against someone and then later mention that you just insulted your neighbour across the street with vile words; your child may begin to think of you as a hypocrite. We should remember what Jim Henson said, “The attitude that you have as a parent is what your kids will learn from, more than what you tell them. They don’t remember what you try to teach them. They remember what you are.”

Equally some parents correct their child for stealing when they themselves often do so. Your son or daughter may view you as a charlatan if you act a certain way in public and a different way in private. Every parent should remember that one day the child will follow his example instead of his advice. In every area of your life always ask yourself, “Am I practising what I am teaching?” 

The list in not exhaustive, but Watch out for the concluding part this evening.